In which Layla and Roz emulate hipsters, race to the centre of a maze, and travel in style

By Layla

The sun was shining through our floor-to-ceiling windows as we leapt from bed for our first full day in Vancouver. Alas our apartment was not located next to a coffeeshop or supermarket so I went for a wander and eventually returned with a bagel. We breakfasted on our 32nd floor balcony, looking out over the city, before catching a bus to the gay-ish West End, in time for our city bike tour. 

We always love bike tours as a way to get a handle on a new big city, though this one turned out to be less illuminating... But still fun. We headed into Stanley Park, which is this huge city park that combines beach and forest, and tons of beautiful bike trails. We cycled round the 'sea wall' with fantastic views of the city and mountains and sparkling water and queues of container ships waiting for their slot at the port. We saw totem poles, and quirky statues, and a beaver dam. Then we zoomed out of the park and along the waterfront to a beach called English Bay, before catching a very tiny ferry across to Granville Island. Previously an industrial zone, it's now an artistic enclave with studios, shops, and a big market where we had lunch. Next, along yet another waterfront, False Creek - Vancouver seems to be mostly made of waterfronts! Past the Olympic Village from 2010, into a very pretty Chinese Garden, through Gastown, and back to the shop. A fun cycle, though we both got a little sunstroke. We bought some groceries and headed back home to recover (aka eat crisps and drink wine). 

Duly recovered, we found a bus and headed off to a more obscure part of town. Past some suburbs, it suddenly appeared: VanDusen Botanical Gardens. I have mixed feelings about this trip. On the one hand, these are probably my favourite botanical gardens I've ever visited. Beautifully landscaped, waterfalls and lakes, interesting sculptures, and an absolutely brilliant maze (many of you will be familiar with my penchant for a maze). It took ages for us to find the centre. When we did it competitively, Roz beat me by miles. Great fun. But sadly every insect in the park found its way to Roz and bit her all over. Each bite swelled to the size of her head. And she has spent the rest of the holiday in itchy pain. But at least the maze was amazing! 

After the gardens, we climbed up to the Queen Elizabeth Park viewpoint and had a fantastic panorama of the entire city, before descending to Vancouver's hipster Mecca, Main Street. Interspersed with pharmacies (for antihistamines), and Chinese establishment was every craft brewery, gallery, yarn shop, and cool coffeeshop that a hipster could desire. We tracked down Shameful Tikki Room, a very cool cocktail den, with some superlative cocktails in a quirky and charming setting, with Bride of Frankenstein playing on the little television screens. If I owned a bar I wouldn't mind it being like this. Then, on a whim, we decided to go to Acorn which turns out to have all these accolades as the top vegetarian restaurant in the country. We splashed out on an array of deliciousness, and got the bus home feeling very proud of ourselves - and very hip. 

The next day I'd slept okay but Roz was miserable, covered all over with bites, and a new sore throat to match. Any energetic plans had to be shelved and instead we went to Revolver, a very exposed brick-ish coffeeshop, where Roz was able to indulge in a coffee flight! We've had wine flights, beer flights, cheese flights, cocktail flights... But a coffee flight was a new and hilarious innovation. One type of coffee done three ways (drip, aero press and clever press, in case you wish to replicate!). It rejuvenated Roz enough that she was ready for some non-mosquito fun. And thus we went to the Vancouver Gallery of Art. 

We'd read some books by Douglas Coupland but hadn't realized he is an artist too. The museum had a big Coupland exhibition, and it was really, unexpectedly excellent. We loved much of his intriguing exhibits, which all comment on how we are in the 21st century. But by the end Roz looked like she might be about to die, so I left her in an uninspiring French coffeeshop with a sandwich while I went on a medication expedition. Having filled her with every decongestant, antihistamine and steroid cream I could get my hands on, we returned to the gallery to see the permanent collection. We were particularly taken with a Canadian artist called Michael Snow. 

Then we decided on an expedition to North Vancouver (a separate city!) by sea bus. So we boarded and crossed the water, to find ice cream and beer flights. Delicious. There wasn't much else though, so after a suitable amount of consumption, we returned home to gather our energy for the evening. Or Roz did - I ran around trying to find a fax machine for a work thing. 

Heading out, we had a half hour walk through Yaletown to a ferry terminal where we boarded and headed off to Granville Island again, to see Vancouver's improv troupe. First we had a quick dinner in the market and wandered around the arty establishments, then we procured some Granville Island craft beer, and then we settled down to what was a very funny and impressive improv show - a fantastic evening. Shame Roz felt like death and yet got dragged home on another ferry followed by another half hour walk... And a sleepless night for one of us. Not me. 

On our final Vancouver day, we dropped off our luggage, coated Roz in insect repellent, then headed to Stanley Park again, this time on foot. We strolled along the scenic sea wall til we got to the TeaHouse, a posh and lovely establishment where we indulged in mimosas and lunch. And then we walked back through the forest, huge trees all around us. During our bike tour they told us that there's a small movement for the North West parts of Canada and the US to form their own country called Cascadia, based on their tall trees that are nowhere else on the continent. We certainly could see the resemblance to Forest Park in Portland. It was a lovely walk. 

And then we took the bus to... The Heliport! You see, after Vancouver we'd planned to go to Victoria. I thought the ferry was an easy and pleasant option. But it turns out to be 50 miles out of town! Then we found that a helicopter goes straight from Vancouver harbour. Then we found that they had a special discount on Twitter. And then we realized that we'd both always wanted to ride in a helicopter. And we were in!

As a commuter mode of transport, the helicopter is surely one of the coolest available. We were given our earplugs, hopped into our window seats, and soon were smoothly pottering above Vancouver. We waved goodbye to it as we went out over the water to find views that demanded photographs. Half an hour later we touched down in Victoria. 

In which Layla and Roz travel by train, ski lift, paddleboard and trampoline

By Layla

After a frustrating 3 hour delay at the train station, finally we were off! Champagne glasses clinked in the observation car as our overnight VIArail train from Jasper to Vancouver started trundling through the Rockies. Roz and I both dream romantically of long distance train travel so we were fizzing with excitement. First lesson: people don't sit on their allocated seats but rather in the glass observation car or coffee car, where the views of the mountains were very cool. Second observation: there are drinks and snacks aplenty. Third: try not to get the late seating for dinner unless you want to eat at 10pm. Fourth: if you go to bed right after dinner, and are placed next to a snorer, there may be no sleep for you. Essentially, we had a fabulous time on the train. The views of the Rocky Mountains were spectacular, and we loved the novelty of sit-down meals on the train. Shame about Roz's lack of sleep. In the middle of the night she apparently stumbled from her berth to an empty cabin to escape the snorer... Only for a poor crew member to climb into that cabin bed in hope of a quick nap! It was not a restful night for her, and the arrival to Vancouver was a bit delayed, and it took ages to get our bags, but soon we were off on the Skytrain for a mad dash across town to the pick up point for our bus to our next destination: Whistler! (To add to the excitement, I'd failed to book it in advance...)

Whistler turns out to be less than 2 hours away by bus and we found it a surprisingly delightful little town. While Banff and Jasper felt like trading posts set up to tend to the adventurers passing through, Whistler is a town built with intent. The main business is skiing - though mountain biking is big. The town itself centers around an attractive pedestrianized shopping/restaurant precinct called the "Village Stroll", from which hiking and biking trails spread out, and a gondola sweeps you to the top of looming Whistler Mountain. After dumping our stuff in our pleasant hotel, we leapt in a taxi to Wayside Park, on the banks of pretty Lake Alta, and hired paddleboards. Next up: a delightful hour of paddling along a sunny lake surrounded by mountains. Followed by guacamole and chips on a golf club patio. Hooray. 

We had a tasty Indian meal that night and finished up with a jacuzzi which inexplicably was right next to our hotel room bed! An excellent introduction to Whistler. Then to bed - much appreciated after Roz's train sleep fiasco. 

The next morning we hired bicycles and set off along the Valley Trail, 40km of paved-ish walking and bike trails from Whistler. It was really lovely. We cycled past lake after lake, under the scenic mountain skyline, and stopped for lunch on an extremely scenic restaurant patio overlooking Green Lake and lots of mountains. After lots more cycling we rested at a little beautifully manicured park/beach area and watched the locals frolic in the sun, before cycling back to town, returning our bikes, and getting on a bus to what seemed the middle of nowhere. 

When we got off at a deserted roadside I admit I had my doubts about Roz's planning... But then we turned a corner and found ourselves far from touristy Whistler, at two great attractions: Whistler Brewing Company, and the main focus of our expedition, Bounce! A quick fueling at WBC (and a game of Battleships), then we entered what can only be described as a trampoline extravaganza. We were admitted to a huge, high-ceiling end room with padded walls and about 10 trampolines. Little ones. Huge Olympic-ish one. Ones angled on the wall at 45 degrees. It was sort of set up like a skateboard thing, and clearly many of its customers were skateboarders. Luckily for the first hour we were its only customers and we bounced up and down and around with delight. Then proper people arrived and showed us how it was really done, flying through the air, leaping from trampoline to trampoline, running along the vertical walls like they were in a video game, and essentially being rather cooler than Roz and I whose main daredevil trick was a seat drop (bouncing on one's bottom...). 

We loved watching the cool kids, and eventually I was able to drag Roz away (having not done fun stuff like this as a kid, her delight and attention span for these things are virtually unlimited!). We returned to the lovely bar for beer tasting flights and copious packets of crisps, before returning to town for tacos, Netflix, and weird in-room jacuzzi to avoid trampoline-induced muscle pain...

Said pain was of course inevitable, but regardless, the next morning we set off up the mountain. Whistler has tons of gondolas and ski lifts for ski season, and during the summer you can go up for views and hiking and restaurants at the top of the mountain. The first gondola took half an hour, enclosed and pretty, and we had a mini-hike at the top before taking a second lift, this one a proper ski lift, to the very summit of Whistler Mountain. We both found this inordinately exciting, feet dangling as we climbed high above the glaciers below, before stepping out to 360 degree views of beautiful snow-capped peaks. 

We decided to do a little hike to the absolute peak. Halfway through what turned out to be a bit of a chilly rock scramble, Roz pointed out that her sprained ankle hadn't magically recovered, and we made it back to the ski lift without doing anything too crazy. On the way back down our ski lift malfunctioned and we had an exciting few minutes dangling immobile in the air before the power returned, we made it back, and headed on our next lift: the peak to peak gondola between two mountains - apparently the longest of its kind. We soared across the sky, with fantastic views. Then, noting the time, decided to skip the hiking options and head down the mountain on two open air and equally exciting chair lifts. What a really cool experience. 

We had lunch at a delicious restaurant, Elements, before dashing to the purpose of our hurrying: all aboard the Rocky Mountaineer from Whistler to Vancouver! We'd extravagantly splashed out on this train experience, essentially the posh version of VIArail, and were unimpressed by it in terms of poshness (plastic cutlery and aeroplane food did not dazzle) but the views were an absolute delight, moving from mountain scenery to forest to a huge sparkling lake to the beautiful Vancouver skyline. We sat in the outdoor observation car and loved it. 

By 8pm we were ensconced in our Vancouver home - a very cool apartment on the 32nd floor of an apartment block with floor-to-ceiling windows looking out over the city. And from there it was a hop, skip and a jump to the cool Gastown area where we settled down in a fab hipster wine/cheese establishment called Salt for wine flights, cheese and dessert. And a horribly inconvenient suspicion that we want to live in Vancouver!

In which Roz and Layla walk and walk and walk (and drink tea)

By Roz

Next morning I blithely set our alarms for a little later (7.30 - the luxury) confident that our bus pick-up wasn't till 8.45. It was thus disappointing to receive a tetchy phone call whilst we were eating our breakfast informing us that our pick-up was at 8.15 and we were 20 minutes late and we were keeping everyone waiting. This kind of error is most unlike me and I felt mortified as we ran along the road to catch it. 

Mortification diminished however as we left Banff and headed through the mountains to a place called Lake Louise (attractive mountains puts things in proportion). It's known for being a beautiful area and for having been named after Queen Victoria's fourth daughter (who very ungratefully never visited). We were the only people to hop off the bus the (everyone else was heading to the ice fields to walk on a glacier) and thus I felt enabled to force Layla to wait an unfeasibly long time whilst I got a cup of tea (which was of no interest to her). Thus fortified we began a walk through the forest to the highest teahouse in Canada (or possibly North America - I should have read the guidebook more carefully). More tea, you say? Why yes, what could be more appropriate for an English girl abroad! 

The hike up was lovely, other than disappointingly uphill. This could have been anticipated by the canny hiker. Sadly I was focussed on the tea and only worked this out half way up. This is all the more unfortunate for me as Layla and I have a deal that I carry the rucksack uphill and she carries it when we are in the flat or going downhill. When I made this deal I thought it would work out well for me.  Alas I was wrong. We passed increasingly fat chipmunks (which gave me much hope for the glory of the teahouse) and eventually arrived at a beautifully blue lake overlooked by the famed teahouse. (Lakes in Canada are proving to be bluer than I ever thought water could be which is both lovely and puzzling.) We'd been supplied with sandwiches by our tour company and we consumed these fast before settling down in the teahouse for tea and suchlike (the suchlike obviously covers a multitude of food sins) whilst we read our books. I was captivated by mine - set in Papua New Guinea - and eventually Layla had to drag me away from my seat to walk back.  Alas we'd been seduced by the idea of doing a loop to get back to Lake Louise. This loop - though delightful - proved to have more uphill than I would have liked (including going up and over a little mountain in our path), but it finished walking along the brilliant blue Lake Louise and surrounded by mountains which was very lovely. We found that all of this had taken far longer than we'd anticipated and by the time we got back, our bus pickup was only 15 minutes away. We thus ditched my fantasy of scones and tea in the fancy Fairmont Hotel in favour of crisps and a beer. Not a terrible exchange... Back in Banff we collapsed on our beds before going out for a pizza.

We woke up on Wednesday conscious that it was our last day in Banff. I looked woeful till Layla reminded me that we are visiting 8 other places on this holiday so our trip is far from over.  But there's clearly no better way to ward off almost woe than going to a mad hot springs up a mountain and so that is exactly what we did. We got the bus up and were slightly disconcerted to be the only people getting off the bus at this stop (can it be that not everyone thinks a random hot spring is the way to spend a morning?) but went in regardless. It turned out to be very cheery (if not exactly popular) and it was fun to be in an outdoor hot spring at the top of a mountain. Having been boiled in a lobster-esque fashion, we got the bus down again and returned to my favourite coffee shop to read and have lunch. Back at our hotel too early for the pick-up for our bus to our next destination - Jasper - we started worrying that the pick-up wouldn't turn up or indeed that we'd got the time wrong (again). Alas the former turned out to be true and there was too much pfaff for my taste before we found ourselves on a (now delayed) bus to Jasper. But the bus journey turned out to be fun, taking us through ice fields (apparently one of the most beautiful drives in Canada) and past bears (three - including two cubs) and some elks. We eventually arrived into Jasper in the early evening, having found the bus much more fun than we'd anticipated. Having checked into our guesthouse (run by an over-enthusiastic Welsh woman who was very excited to find we were from the UK and who said I seemed too outgoing - did this mean loud? - to be a diplomat) we went out for a delicious, if not cheap, dinner. On the way home, we popped into a supermarket to buy breakfast for the morning and I remembered my love of ice wine - acquired on our first trip to Canada. So we acquired a couple of miniatures and headed home to enjoy them. 

Next morning our plan was a hike in the nearby environs and then to settle down in a cafe to read. This plan would have worked well had we not managed to misunderstand the length of the hiking endeavor we had settled on. We had our doubts as the cab drove for 20 or so minutes into the mountains before depositing us at a trailhead (our plan being to walk back into town from there). But we stifled these and set off past more beautiful blue lakes (with an occasional bit of singing to ward off bears). 2 and a half hours in I felt glad we had acquired lunch before setting off and we consumed it. 4 hours in and I was getting a bit tired (not least because there was more uphill than I had hoped). But the views were lovely so when, at hour 4 and a half, Layla suggested we add an extra loop on to take in another lake which had a hotel with tea, I said yes. Alas this proved rash because not 5 minutes in I managed to half sprain my ankle. It started puffing up in an unfortunate fashion, but we couldn't really think what else to do except continue on (though ha, I got out of carrying the rucksack!). We arrived at the lake and I bunged my foot in the exceptionally cold water for a while (whilst eating an ice cream Layla had acquired). We then headed up to the hotel and acquired apple pie, cocktails and tea. The staff were bizarrely worried about my ankle and a first aiding security guard was dispatched ("code orange") to fix it. She was sweet (and came from London) though somewhat incompetent with her bandaging. But we fixed the bandage after she had gone, and when Layla made me walk home - another hour of walking - afterwards I was very grateful for its support. Back at our guesthouse, we collapsed exhausted on the sofa and swore off walking so far again. But of course, it wasn't long before we were out again, this time for dinner. This was a jolly affair (punctuated by me taking painkillers). Back at the end of the evening, we drank a little more ice wine and investigated VPN options in an attempt to watch an episode of the UK's Location Location Location, which our friends were on. We were unsuccessfully but went to bed determined to try again in the morning. 

And so it was that this morning after a not so delightful chat with my mother and packing we found ourselves watching our friends and envying the home they found to buy on the programme. From there, the very nice husband / co-owner of the guesthouse gave us a lift to the station so we could check our bags in ahead of our train journey (overnight!) to Vancouver. And we are now sat in a lovely coffeeshop, drinking tea and not walking. Hooray. 

In which Layla and Roz hone their bear combat skills and take a lot of steps

By Layla

The looks on people's faces when we told them we were going to the Canadian Rockies on holiday was mostly incredulity: "but usually you go somewhere weird, and this time you're going somewhere everyone dreams of going!"

Sure enough, Canada is close, and the hype about the Canadian Rockies is persuasive... And it's beautifully doable without a car... So we took the plunge, and tried not to look at the rain-saturated weather forecast. Flying into Calgary, we only really had time to glance at the city and it didn't really enchant. But no matter: it was a mere staging post. The next day, in true holiday style, I set our alarm for 5:15am and before we knew it we were on the bus to Banff.  

What a difference an hour makes. As Roz fell asleep, we were leaving Calgary. It was flat, bright, unremarkable. Then she opened her eyes as we were nearing Banff and we were up in the clouds, jagged mountains poking romantically through the gaps, and misty, pointy trees as far as the eye could see. This was a landscape we'd never encountered before! So we dropped our bags at our hotel, walked into town, fueled up with tasty treats at the town bakery, and explored. The town of Banff is like a frontier town. It's set up as a supply post for people doing various outdoorsy things in the mountains, and it definitely has that vibe. Yet the people doing outdoorsy things tend to be quite well off, so the town's shops have evolved to cater to their desires. It's quite eclectic, and set on the banks of a brilliant turquoise river, in the shadow of some breathtakingly beautiful mountains. I can't remember ever being so impressed by scenery. 

On our first day, after terrifyingly investing in a can of bear spray, complete with instructions about what to do if a bear approached, we climbed Tunnel Mountain. The trail starts right from town and winds up a little mountain, with fantastic views. It was a perfect start to our holiday - and we were sure to loudly talk the whole way to deter the bears. (Not a chore for me!) After an excellent lunch in a fancy bistro back in town, we headed out on another walk, this one along the river to Bow Falls where we watched the water racing over the rocks as water also started falling from the sky. Out came the raincoats. Once the rain died down, we walked up to the Fairmont Hotel, which looks like a huge castle, and had afternoon tea (mmm scones). Very civilised! That evening we sampled the town's fancy schmancy vegetarian restaurant, Nourish, and it was extremely delicious. What a successful first day in Banff! 

The next day was cold and rainy - just the day for white water rafting! Hmmm... But we had pre-booked, so it was non-negotiable. We shivered during the safety briefing, eyeing the completely non-tempting Kicking Horse River. "It's 5 degrees C!" Our guide cheerily informed us... Luckily we were suited up in wetsuits and fleeces and raincoats and water shoes, so the prospect of getting splashed became slightly less horrifying - which was just as well as the rapids went up to Class 4! (For the uninitiated, this means very wavy indeed). It started off smoothly and we drifted along in this weird, drizzly, grey world of jagged mountains and strange rock formations called hoodoos and pointy tree forests... I felt I was in Lord of the Rings. Then there was no time to think as the rapids began in earnest and I had to occupy myself with paddling, clinging to the rope, and shrieking as I was entirely drenched. It was a lot of fun. 

Back in town, we walked home for a rare moment of reading, before it was time to hike up a big hill to the Banff Arts Centre. Which is perched above the town and is famous for its film festival in November. However tonight it was showing a special program of short films from last year's festival - very cool. After dinner in their restaurant, overlooking spectacular scenery, we enjoyed the films, about adventure sports, fittingly, before following the rest of the audience down the hill, through the woods, and back to town. 

On Sunday, we promised ourselves a rare and special treat: no alarm clock! In fact we almost missed breakfast, so long did we sleep, but luckily Roz sweet talked our way into some food, then we set out to Cave and Basin, the birthplace of Canada's National Parks, apparently, thanks to them finding hot springs - sadly no longer in use. But we went behind the springs and set off on quite a significant hike to Sundance Canyon. This was a pretty hike through the forest, and alongside waterfalls. Delightfully for me, our fear of bears meant that our walk was accompanied by my loud and tuneless rendition of the songs from Guys and Dolls. No bears appeared, so we celebrated with a delicious lunch back in the Cave and Basin cafe before logging onto wifi and admiring our new Jawbone pedometers' recording of our efforts... And then heading off to canoe! Other than our lack of skill with the canoe (mine perhaps extra-lacking), it was a glorious trip, up a little narrow forested waterway, popping out into Vermillion Lake, the mountains surrounding us on every side, birds flitting across the water... It was quite idyllic. After beers on our hotel's patio, we initially meant to have dinner in a new place... But then shamefacedly but delightedly found ourselves back in Nourish. Mmmm. 

Today it was another early start, to catch a bus to Sunshine Meadows. It was a happy coincidence that this was our first day of actual sunshine so the meadows could live up to their name. It's a ski resort in winter, but in summer has a 10km walking train that winds across meadows full of flowers, and past three sparkling lakes. It was an absolute delight - possibly the prettiest hike we've ever done! We also enjoyed lunch outside on the balcony afterwards, before heading back to town, where I was informed there is no rest for the wicked... And before  I knew what was happening, found myself back in a canoe, this time heading upriver. Another breathtakingly beautiful experience. Banff is really spectacular, and the canoeing was suitably idyllic. We're now back at the hotel, admiring the readings on our pedometers, coveting dinner, and preparing for an early morning start tomorrow. For a change...